I am the owner of Bloom Art Studio in Mokena, IL. I LOVE ART! I am a middle-aged woman who vows to live each day artfully and with intention. Teaching art, walking the dog, painting, photography, reading books and writing are my favorite ways to pass the time.
“Reading about nature is fine, but if a person walks in thewoods and listens carefully, he can learn more than what is in books, for they speak with the voice of God.” –George Washington Carver
This morning, Xander and I went for what’s becoming our regular morning walk at the St. Francis Woods. Today was particularily gentle weather-wise, and we took advantage of it. Tomorrow calls for snow flurries and colder temps. Walking with my sweet dog and sipping on a hot cup of Dunkin’ Donuts coffee is a great way to start my day. I was grateful for the chance to take him once again and witness his joy as he ran and chased squirrels and explored. We even met a few ladies there who couldn’t resist patting him and talking to him.
“At night, I open the window and ask the moon to come and press its face against mine. Breathe into me. Close the language-door and open the love-window. The moon won’t use the door, only the window.” ~Rumi
I love windows with divided light. I find it enchanting.
There is just something about windows with a lace curtain that sets my heart all aflutter. I find it enchanting-charming-lovely. I especially love this type of window in old farmhouses, or older homes with character. Ahh, to sit by a window with a view and just soak up the sunlight, or to curl up in a chair beside one on a drizzly day. Windows are perfect to focus on or through while gathering thoughts or ideas or contemplating something. Pair a book and a window and you have the ideal simple pleasure.
What lies beyond?
How do you feel about windows? What’s your simple pleasure?
If you’ve been following my blog for any length of time, then you probably know I make a ‘Santa Baby Christmas List’ every year-a whimsical and sassy way of letting the world know just what I’d like if I could have anything. Like the song, it’s frivolous and unrealistic, but it’s fun.
Right after Thanksgiving I started to give some thought to my list, wondering what I should include this year. I pondered it and tossed around some ideas, but honestly, I just wasn’t feeling that ‘Santa Baby’ vibe this year. I couldn’t think of anything I really wanted and I was distracted and a bit ill at ease about the whole thing. I’m in a place right now where I’m fairly content with my life. I just don’t feel the need for a lot of stuff.
This has been such a volatile year in the markets, the country’s economy is out of whack and I have a couple of dear friends who’ve hit enormous difficulties being out of work for the past two years. They are wiped out-the safety net is depleted, they are seriously struggling and it’s not getting any better. I am fearful for their future. I also am worried about my 83 year old mom who is suffering with some serious health problems relating to her kidneys, bad heart valves and clogged arteries. I’ve been doing a lot of praying lately. So in the spirit of not being insensitive towards my hurting friends, my mom, and others out there who are suffering from the same economic catastrophes, I’ve decided to waive the Santa Baby Christmas list this year.
What my thoughts keep reverting back to this Christmas season is the simple things. How I love books. And a warm bed with cozy blankets and pillows and a warm fire with my sweet dog curled up next to me. How I enjoy walking through the St. Francis Woods with Xander on crisp winter mornings, soaking up the serenity and solitude my soul is crying out for. How I love being with my kids and just having them around me. How I enjoy coffee with precious girlfriends, creating art and laughing till it hurts. How I love curling up on the sofa with a warm blanket and the dog and my family and watching a marathon of The Office or some other show I’m really in the mood to see.
I don’t need anything fancy this year-ever really. But what I would love more than anything is to have my friends catch a break from the universe and land that job that’s gonna make it all better. I need my mom to have more good days than bad ones. I need her quality of life to improve so she smiles more and has the energy to do the things she’s used to doing everyday without getting out of breath. These are the things I need. Are you listening Santa? God? That’s all I need.
I am borrowing this post written by an amazing author named Jon Katz. You can find his blog here. (Thank you Jon for the permission). I think his words go hand in hand with this wonderful YouTube video made by a very optimistic, positive 18 year old. Watch it-it’s so inspiring-and actually may be just what you needed to see today.
——-
There is a point in life where death ceases to be an abstract thing that happens to unfortunate and older people, but becomes something that is closer than many other things, and not really abstract at all. That is a turning point in life, I think, and you can think about it and learn about it, or you can get your pills and diapers and senior discounts and run and hide from it and get blindsided when it comes. This is not morbid for me. In a way thinking about death is thinking about life, and how one wants to live. Perhaps this is why I became a hospice volunteer a few years ago, and just finished a three month tour for a book about grieving for animals.
If you have animals, you will learn about grief and loss soon enough, and I’ve had a lot of animals and learned a lot about it.
What have I learned?
Grief and love are twins, connected to one another without boundary, equal and haunting beautiful parts of the same whole. Life does not exist without death, and grief does not exist without love. You grieve what you love, and grief is a process with its own mind, sometimes. I have learned that grieving is critical, purifying, cleansing, like death, not something to be avoided or denied.
And always, always, right next to grief is the beautiful reality of love, two of our most powerful emotions locked in an eternal dance with one another. Because you will never see one without the other right behind it.
What have I learned?
Grief is love, and love is grief. Just as there is no light without darkness, there is no love without loss. And although this seems to often catch us by surprise, it is one of the unalterable truths, I have come to believe.
”Come In, Lord.”
“Beautiful is the new snow falling in the yard and the fox who is staring boldly
up the path, to the door. And still I believe you will come, Lord: you will, when I speak to the fox,
the sparrow, the lost dog, the shivering sea-goose, know that really I am speaking to you
whenever I say, as I do all morning and afternoon: Come in, come in.”
– Mary Oliver, “Making The House Ready For The Lord.”
“With eye upraised his master’s look to scan, The joy, the solace, and the aid of man: The rich man’s guardian and the poor man’s friend, The only creature faithful to the end.”
I started this painting as a commission, but it didn’t turn out as planned, so I went a different direction and created this abstract, nebulous work of color. It’s got some really interesting detail. The size of this painting is a whopping 4′ X 5′. It would be perfect over a sofa on a large, open wall. This painting is available on Etsy by clicking here.
I love this...and want to paint a sign of my own with this exact message.Took a break from painting today....Today called for my Lands End rain jacket.He sits in the front seat just like a person!Waiting.....
Xander waiting to come in after taking the boys to school.Lookie what I bought myself....Won't this look lovely on a black sweater?
If you want one of these, you can go here to find it.
Yesterday a wave of happiness and contentedness washed over me. I have been feeling better about things in my life in general and I feel the tide of change’s gentle click.
I’ve been painting more in the last month and it feels really good. I’m not turning out anything spectacular, but what is happening is the process is stirring something inside of me. Just having the ability to dip my hands in paint and then to canvas has churned a new bliss in me. I also intend on having a very artful 2012. In the next year I plan on attending a few art retreats and focusing on learning some teaching techniques to become a painting instructor-or at least that is my ultimate goal from all of this. The teaching part may not happen till much later, because let’s face it-I have a lot to learn and gather about the process, in addition to learning how to work with other people who will have needs and emotions brought forth from the act of painting. It’s all so very therapeutic. And spiritual. I can’t wait to see where it leads me. In addition to attending some workshops/retreats, I am making a personal goal to complete 100 paintings by the end of 2012. This is something that is essential to accomplishing my overall goals in art.
I painted a little sign for my studio and I’m putting it in a place where I can read it all the time. It’s just what I need to see.
Not only is my happiness quotient going up, but I have been changing my eating habits to healthier, more whole foods and I try to avoid processed stuff as much as possible. I have lost 12lbs since May and although I have a whole lot more to lose, I’m not stressing about it because I will lose it. I’m confident. It will be slow but steady and with knowledge and a little activity I know I can do it. I am reading this book which is helping me educate myself in the ways of cooking and eating healthy.
The way I see it, if I have good, healthy food and a means of creativity and self expression, I can go anywhere. I’ll let you know how it goes.
Today as I walked out of the post office and to my car I spotted this beautiful heart shaped leaf lying alone on the rain soaked asphalt. I couldn’t help but smile. Here was proof that love really is everywhere.
I had a wonderful time this past Saturday getting reacquainted with old high school friends at my 30 year reunion. Gosh how time has passed! You wonder where thirty years have gone, and while young the prospect of thirty years in the future was almost unfathomable. But surprise, here I am. I’m so glad we’ve made it, and no sirree, I wouldn’t change a thing-except maybe I’d eat less (if I could go back in time and offload to myself a wealth of practical wisdom it would be, “Keep your mouth closed”.) But, I’m working on that, and what I can honestly say is here, in the now, at the sweet age of 48 I am happy. I am healthy and surging with ideas and possibilities for my future. With the exception of the effects of gravity, all is well. And for that, a song to commemorate the physical changes we’ve all endured to get where we are now.
I can hardly wait for the next reunion in five years, but honestly, it seems like forever between now and then. Funny, it seems unfathomable, just like it felt back in high school. I’ll see you then…Oh, and if I can quote the song, “Gravity….stay the hell away from me.” 😉
Me with some vintage high school friends. We look great, don't we?
Why Jane 