Rambling thoughts

My coffee this morning is particularily delicious. I love, love, love, Dulce de Leche creamer. It’s theBEST.

Sometimes, I feel like I give too much of myself to people. I reveal too much.

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I hate days when the inbox is stagnant. I love emails from friends. They cheer me and make my heart happy for brief moments in time. Do I need to get a life?

Birds are one of my favorite animals….I love to see them in my yard. Every day, I try to throw out stale bread for them. Today, I went the extra mile. I filled up the broken bird feeder and set it on the grass by the willow tree. I hope they appreciate the extra treat today. The damn seagulls are chasing away the sweet black birds. It’s the black birds I really love.
Last night I had a dream we were moving into a lovely old house. I discovered the basement late in the dream. It was glorious with 10 finished rooms, one better than the other. The possibilities of what I could do with each of those rooms is endless…one especially for an art studio. I was so excited when I was sleeping!
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I am getting tired of people calling me and asking me to do stuff for them. When I think about it, I don’t really ask anyone for anything. This past Thursday at 8pm a person I don’t hear from very much called me and asked me if I could type up their resume for them.
WHAT? NOW?
NO.
Maybe tomorrow, I said. They never called.
GOOD.
—-
No good deed goes unpunished. Just when I think I’ve done something good for someone, they surprise me by doing something completely out of character and basically slap me in the face. It makes me think twice about doing nice things again. Maybe my perception of what nice is, is distorted. Maybe the problem is with me.
—–
I’m considering going back to school to begin a whole new chapter of my life. My husband has given me encouragement to go back and start. He’s never done this before. It’s like I’ve entered a room with the freshest of air and all of a sudden I can breathe much clearer. Silly, I know, but that’s how it feels to me. I’m excited about my new beginnings.
—-
I love the longer summer days. I look out, the suns still shining and then I realize it’s almost 7:30pm. It’s so lovely having long, lazy days to look forward to.
I know, in the near future, this mama bird is going to witness a birdie leave the nest. It’s scary and saddens me, but yet, I know it is the course of nature. The advantage humans have is we continue on relationships with our birdies long after they are gone. I’m sure animals don’t see eachother after they leave. That is very sad to me. I’m glad I’m not a bird.
—-
I have an urge to lie down in the grass and feel the wind in my hair. I want to look up and see the birds and the clouds and breathe in the scent of the outdoors.
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5 thoughts on “Rambling thoughts

  1. Going back to school! How exciting!
    The women in my family seem to be the late blooming type. I didn't become a teacher until I was 32. I thought that was SO old!
    When my daughter got divorced and was thinking about going to school to become a nurse, she said, "Good Lord! I'll be 40 when I'm finished!' I reminded her that she'd be 40 in that amount of time even if she didn't spend it in school…
    She's been working at Long Beach Memorial for almost a year now. an RN.
    You go girl.

  2. Going back to school is very exciting! I'm starting on a graphic design program in July…I finally got my BS at 43, and now I'm going back for more. :o)

  3. I say go back to school – follow your heart. My Mom gave me some advice once – "It is okay to say NO". Once I realized that I felt much better and did not ever feel taken advantage of again. I don't have to say it out loud often – "we'll see" works, too.
    I say go lay in the grass and hug a kid today!

  4. Hi Em! Having read this post, it's just my opinion, but I think you should keep on doing those good deeds for others. How very sad to me, it seems that more and more people feel like they've been burned, and the world just gets a little colder, and a little bit more colder… and I wouldn't want to be a part of that! I want to KEEP ON DOING good deeds for others, even if I am just ONE person, trying to do what I can to make this world a better, nicer place!.. Know what I mean? (0;

    Well, I just wanted to let you know I played along with your "clever meme" from the 28th, so if you have the time, and want to see my own spin on it, then come on over! I'm still making dolls! I just LOVE them!.. rag dolls, crochet dolls and clothes, etc, etc.! Good luck with school, if you do go back. I still think about that too!.. but ONE student at a time. My daughter is still going, and THAT'S most important to me right now!

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