Last night, before bed I began to read a book that had my full attention. Shortly after I began, I got interruped by very urgent thoughts that seemed to be coming as a stream, and they demanded my full attention. I grabbed the mini yellow legal pad on my night stand and began to write down the words that came from this persistant voice. I wanted to share them. I think they might help anyone who is going through what I am at the moment-flat out in the middle of a mid-life “what the heck am I to do with my life” situation. For the record, this stuff just flowed out of me. I don’t know where it came from, but I can say for a long time I’ve been praying and asking for answers.
Slow down. One step at a time. Don’t plan, just paint. Let your art and time just flow and lead you to the next step.
Don’t think ahead of what is to be in the future. Allow your life to unfold like a blooming flower. Forcing it or trying too hard to guide it can spoil it.
Don’t think about the possibility of sellng your art just yet. Take baby steps and begin the daily task of painting and dabbling in your art supplies and just journaling.
It’s not about commercializing yourself. If you never became a well known artist, or were unable to support yourself on your art, would you still make art? Sure! You enjoy it immensly. I’m sure you would get a day job and wallow in your art supplies in the evenings and on the weekends.
Don’t set yourself up for disappointment. Your life will lead you where it needs to go . What is most important is being happy and content.
Don’t focus on the sea of artists out there. It’s too overwhelming. Don’t concentrate on their successes. Stay in YOUR zone. Put blinders on if it helps you stay focused on yourself and your own growth.
Don’t forget God. Prayer journal. Shame on you Emily. Go back to it.
Walk Lilly. She needs you and you need her motivation to get you off the chair and outside burning calories.
Don’t abandon your sewing. Make things-simple things and don’t let anyone make you feel like you don’t sew well enough. You sew fine.
Make your 40 birds for the retreat. It will make those ladies so happy.
Paint your large angel and add a tree with paper birds (from the pattern). This needs to get finished. you’ll be proud of it when it is completed.
Love yourself and give yourself a breather. Don’t think about it all the time. Relax. Do. Enjoy. Learn. Reap rewards. Good will come. You have the desire and the love in your heart to accomplish what you want from life. You can’t get it immediately-it’s a building process. One step at a time.
You can and will do it.
Stop confusing yourself with what other artists out there are saying.
Listen to me. Listen to your heart.
You will be fine. You will be healthy. Don’t worry. I know you are trying hard to live a healthier life. You will not be really thin, but you will be healthy-and happy.
Don’t forget me. I am here with you. Always.
Breathe deeply. Stop worrying. Don’t be stressed over Larry. He knows now what he’s done. He is trying to be easier to live with and kinder. Give him a break. Forgive him and loosen your shoulders and don’t tense up. It will be okay.
Be kinder and more loving. You need to work on that. Lately, you’ve been way too edgey. Relax and allow yourself a chance to stop feeling guilty.
Sewing is good for you Emily. It enables you to think clearer. Thought processes unfold before you and ideas gel when you work with your hands.
What you’ve been doing for the last several months is stressing over your uncertainty over your future direction. You are wasting your ‘now’ time by constantly focusing and planning and worrying about what will be. Doing this is causing you to waste the ‘life time’ you have at the present moment. Remember, baby steps. Just do and then follow to what leads you next. Don’t imagine the next step. Be calm, carry on and the step will come to you on it’s own. You will be surprised.
Enjoy the present moments. Savor them. Listen to music. Read stories to inspire you. Stop seeking out mumbo-jumbo self-help books for answers. Your head will just spin and make things all that more confusing for you. The answers will arrive in due time. Just sit back and wait. Don’t cloud up your brain with crap.
Right now you’re not going to create art for other people. It is strictly for you.
Allow me to give you peace and strength. Ask for it when you need it-will power, too. I’ll try. But you have to try to do it yourself, because you will be a better person for it and isn’t that really what you have been praying for?